Focusing on Strengths.
Finding Solutions.®

Sign up to receive our free e-newsletter monthly

Click here and type newsletter in the subject box to receive our monthly newsletter by e-mail

To read more articles written by our therapists, check out our

Newsletter Archive

Links and Resources

• Mental Health Topics
• Child & Parenting Topics
• Marriage & Family
• Corporate Counseling & Work Psychology
• School & Learning
• Sports & Exercise
• Eating Disorders
• Sex Education & Sexuality
• Terrorism & War
• Substance Abuse
• Adoption
• General Health Topics
• Professional Resources
• Fond du Lac Resources

The Magic Wand

Parents Advocating For Children

By Jackie Block, MFT

The statistics are staggering:

• 1 in 5 young people have at least one diagnosable mental or addictive disorder. 
• Nearly 90,000 school–aged children in Wisconsin have a mental illness that impacts their functioning at home, at school and in the community. 
• In 2005, only 15.6% of Wisconsin children with serious mental health disorders received any public mental health services, compared to 32.5% of adults. 
• The suicide rate of youth under the age of 25, in Wisconsin, is 36% higher than the national average.
• Half of all lifetime cases of mental illness begin by age 14; three quarters have begun by age 24.

Children need a network of people and opportunities to decrease the risks of developing social and emotional disorders. One of the easiest things you can do is love your child unconditionally. You are here for your child, not they for you. Your undying love may be the one thing that will carry them through.

Here’s where the magic wand comes in. You are the magic wand. It is up to you to advocate for your child. It is up to you to acknowledge the problem, ask the questions, and pursue the resources to help your child.

Early screening and diagnosis of social and emotional problems is key to preventing less manageable problems in the future. If your young child struggles with sleep problems, eating problems, sensory issues or has experienced loss, grief or trauma in their young life, it is important to look for resources that will help you, help them develop strategies to cope and recover.

As your child’s advocate, start looking for information. Don’t be afraid to ask. It is quite probable that the person you start with will have similar questions and thoughts. Start with talking about whatever concern you have with a family member, friend, religious leader, physician, teacher, school counselor, resource center or mental health agency. There is no shame in asking. The only shame is in not doing anything about it.

Come up with a plan. It may be something you do on your own first. Sometimes by changing our own behaviors we can change the behaviors of others (our children, a whole family). Try as best you can to stick with the ONE different behavior for at least 10 days. Something like, I will develop a bedtime routine that is clear and predictable.

Try modeling for your child the desired behavior. It is no longer the “don’t do as I do, do as I say” world. Children pick up on things you do. You may drink; not pick up after yourself, but you may expect your child not to do these things. They will get non-verbal permission from your actions to do just the same because that’s what you modeled. If you want more “please” and “thank-you’s,” start using more yourself.

If you have made attempts to make changes and continue to feel overwhelmed and concerned about the behavior of your child, it is time to look at some wonderful resources that have been around for some time and some new ones that are in the process of making a significant difference in the lives of children in Fond du Lac County.

I will start with your pediatrician or family physician. If you have questions about development and behavior, this person can be an excellent resource in reassurance or referral. Don’t feel like you need to pretend you know all the answers. None of us do. Sometimes we are too close to the problem to see other alternatives.

If you are a new mother and you are feeling overwhelmed, sad, and not connected to your new infant, it is time to talk with your OB/GYN or family physician. Your mental health is key to your newborn’s social and emotional well-being. Many women have more than the baby blues, and many women do not get treated for post-partum depression. So be proactive, do it for yourself and for the baby; it will benefit both of you beyond belief.

If you have questions about early childhood development and you haven’t gotten the answers you feel comfortable with (remember, keep asking and investigating until you feel there is a definitive answer and/or intervention), contact Birth to 3 or The Family Resource Center. They are excellent sources of information.

The Fond du Lac School System has the CSI (Comprehensive Service Integration) project which is working toward providing information, support and intervention for children with social and emotional problems. They have also created a parent resource and support team to help parents struggling with their child’s mental health issues. Visit www.csifdl.org for more information.

Teen Screen has been in the Fond du Lac School system and other surrounding school districts for several years. All Freshman and those referred with parent permission have the opportunity to take a mental health screening. If there are concerns, parents are contacted and a referral process is started.

NAMI – National Alliance for the Mentally Ill is also a wonderful resource and support for those struggling with mental illness and those who care for them. Visit www.nami.org for more information.

And of course, mental health agencies like Doll & Associates, S.C., are here to help with questions, referrals and therapy for you, your couple, your children, and your family.

The first step begins with asking…